A sardarji comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He's got two large bags over his shoulders.

The guard Iqbal stops him and says, 'What's in the bags?' 'Sand,' answered the Sardarji.

Iqbal says, 'We'll just see about that. Get off the bike.'

Iqbal's guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains the sardarji all night and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. Iqbal releases the sardaji, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the sardarji's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

A week later, the same thing happens. Iqbal asks, 'What have you got?' 'Sand,' says the Sardarji.

Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to the Sardar, and crosses the border on his bike. This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years.

Finally, the Sardarji doesn't show up one day and the guard, Iqbal, meets him in a 'Dhaba' in Islamabad.

'Hey, Buddy,' says Iqbal, 'I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about...I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?'

The Sardaji, sips his Lassi and says, 'Bikes'

Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.

One said to the other, "What's the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun."

"But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we'll melt."

And the first answered, "So what, we'll go at night."

A Sardar, a German and a Pakistani are all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a

smuggled crate of booze when, all of a sudden, Saudi police rush in and

arrest them.



The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so for

the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are

all sentenced to death! However, after many months and with the help of very

good lawyers, they are able to successfully appeal their sentences down to

life imprisonment.



By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial

finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheik decided they could be released

after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.



As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik announced: "It's my

first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one

wish before your whipping."



The German was first in line, he thought for a while and then said: "Please

tie a pillow to my back.�EUR� This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10

lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done the German

had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.



The Pakistani was next up. After watching the German in horror he said

smugly: "Please fix two pillows to my back." But even two pillows could only

take 15 lashes before the whip went through again and the Pakistani was soon

led away whimpering loudly.



The Sardar was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheik

turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of the world and

your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two

wishes!"



"Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness," Sardar replied. "In

recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but

100 lashes."



"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very

brave." The Sheik said with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is

what you desire, then so be it.



And your second wish, what is it to be?" the Sheik asked.



Sardar smiled and said, "Tie the Pakistani to my back" !!!

Surd Names

Desi who falls at people's feet: Charan Singh
Desi who falls at peopls' feet and stays there: Gir charan Singh
A gangster Punjabi Female: Hard Kaur
Punjabi who drinks only beer: Just-beer(Jasbir) Singh
Punjabi who has only one drink : Just-one (Jaswant) Singh
Punjabi who visits every temple: Har Mandir Singh
Punjabi Female's boyfriend: Her-Pal Singh

Santa and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from Patiyala to New Delhi. The lawyer asks if he would like to play a fun game. Santa, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me fifty rupees, and vice versa."

Again, Santa declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me Rs. 50, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you Rs. 5000."

This catches Santa's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"

Santa doesn't say a word, reaches into his purse, pulls out a Rs. 50 bill, and hands it to the lawyer. "Okay," says the lawyer, "your turn." Santa asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes back with four legs?"

The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references ... no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress ... no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail. After an hour,
he wakes Santa and hands him Rs. 5000. Santa thanks him and turns back to
get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, stirs Santa and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"

Without a word, Santa reaches into his purse, hands the lawyer Rs. 50, and goes back to sleep. And you thought Sardars were dumb.